Figuring Things Out

Figuring Things Out

Throughout our lives there are fixed points in time where we realize something for the first time, or for the first time something we've always known or have been told finally clicks for us. Becoming a father has been a transformative time in my life, I've discovered things about myself I don't like, things which I have  determined to change so that our son has the best example possible when he looks at me as his father. I'm sure many parents have gone through this time and many still are going through it. Life is a constantly changing event. Change is just part of life, and when we have the honesty and clarity of mind to realize when we need to make changes, and then act on that knowledge, then that's when I believe we are at our best in many respects. The following are some of those thoughts:

I think about Emerson every day, something I know will never change, and I take a look at myself and consider my ways. For my son, I want good role models and examples to follow; that all begins with me. Emerson will learn what it means to be a man, as he grows up, and he will look to me to learn those things. He will learn how he is to treat women, his fellow man, his brethren, his friends, his family, those whom society casts off, the downtrodden, the weak and feeble, those in authority; how I treat others influences how he will do the same. How I love his mother and how I lead our home will influence who he becomes as a man, how he treats his own wife one day, how he leads his own household. My diligence in personally studying God's word, leading my family in doing the same, the priority I give it, and the love I have for His word; all this will be seen by my son, all this will teach him by example how to respect God's word and how we are to use His word to guide us daily (Lord, give me the strength and good sense to not neglect this!). It is my job, as a father, to lead my home in observing all of God's word, loving the Lord faithfully, and teaching them daily God's word (Deut.6:4-9). As a family, it is our goal to pursue 1 Timothy 3 and Titus 1:5-16; I want to serve God in the capacity He has given and how I raise my home determines whether I'll be qualified for that privilege when the time comes. The qualifications given in those texts are high ones to pursue and noble things to undertake. In the present time there are a shortage of men qualified to be elders and it is our goal as a family to not let this be the case, as much as we can effect it, when we arrive to that point in our lives. So much falls on my shoulders as a man, as a father, as the leader and head of my household; but thanks be to God that my Heavenly Father has not left me weak and unable to bear up under it through Him. God gives me the strength, the ability, the means, the opportunity to serve Him as He has laid out, so beautifully and easy to understand, in His word. There is no doubt, no illusion, no misunderstanding, of just what God calls me to do and be as a man; as a father; as His servant; as His adopted son; as His kin, through Christ. So what is left for me to do but follow-through on what God expects (Josh.24:15)? My son Emerson, my dear son, my actions must be true and my example fitting, for as you see daddy do you will surely want to follow. I pray to God that I not let Him down, nor you. There will be times where I, as your father, will stumble and even fall, but when this happens son watch my actions after this; let me teach you in these times how to get back up (like a fighter, a warrior, who doesn't know the meaning of "stay down"), how to make amends, how to truly repent, and how to get back to following God faithfully. As you watch me, son, remember 1 Corinthians 11:1 and truly "Imitate me, as I imitate Christ." Hold me accountable, respectfully, to God and His word. I know from my own father that there will be times where you will be the instructor, and me the student; never let these times go to your head, son. Follow 1 Timothy 4:12-13,16 and be an example and force for good in this dark, sinful world. Be a light in the midst of this darkness, be a formidable foe and a force to be reckoned with to satan and his followers - do this, not of your own power or strength, but through your strength in the Lord.

So much of this, son, depends on me as your father. As you age, I ask you to do something extremely important: pray for me. Pray for me, son, as I do daily for you. I look forward to teaching you how to pray to our God, our Creator, our Heavenly Father. There will be times where you, for whatever reason, don't want to share something with me; i know these times may come, but I ask that you, Emerson, never take this approach with God. Never forget to take everything to Him, small or great, good or bad, sad or happy, requests, as well as praise and thanks. God has given you all, give your all to Him.

I fervently pray that I be a proper example, a good father, faithful adviser, one day even your friend; but, most importantly, I look forward to the time where we will be brothers in Christ. The fact of you has already made me a better man, Emerson. I look forward to plenty more of these times as we prepare to meet one another for the first time and throughout the rest of our lives. I love you, son.